Kid Ethnic: Mixed-Race Adventures in Japan: article

The Dark Knight of Hamburger Small · 3 days ago

In Japan, Superman had been popular. Ultraman has his own Ultraman Land theme park not far from where I live. Spiderman? Generally regarded as pretty cool.

But Batman, explained our local friend, was not so big here.

“He cannot shoot beams from his eyes,” she said. “He cannot fly.”

True.

“We say he is shoboi,” she said.

It was a word I didn’t know. She tried to explain.

“It is like when you see a picture of a big hamburger,” she said. “But then they bring you a small hamburger. We say that hamburger is shoboi.”

Ouch.

INDIAN BONUS:
Do you love cultural mash-up superheroes? Yes? Perhaps you would enjoy some youtubed Shaktiman? He, like you, is an enemy of all things shoboi.

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Indian Breakfast Recipe: Rub · 17 days ago

Hey Fairly Indian Kid! How’d you get that smile?

What’s that? A wholesome whole-wheat breakfast of buttery goodness? Home-made hot-cereal treat of Bollywood stars? [1] Sort of like oatmeal but way better/buttery-er?

Got a recipe? Great, here we go:

—RUB—
There are two major steps to the rubbing process. Preparation of the base (butter, wheat, and almonds) and the final prep of the rub. If you don’t have almonds, no worries, just make it without.

Pre-Prepared Base
1 stick butter
3 cups whole wheat flower
crushed almonds as desired (abt 40)

Cook butter and wheat in sauce pan or skillet over medium heat while constantly folding the mixture over until it begins to stick to the bottom of the pan (abt 10 minutes). Remove mixture from heat and let cool to just above room temp. After cooling, add crushed almonds to finish it off. The finished base should look like a ground powder and can be stored in the fridge or freezer until whenever.

Rub
1/2 cup base
1 cup milk
-sugar as desired

Cook base and milk in pot at medium heat until mixture begins to thicken. Add sugar as desired.

Recipe courtesy of my dad and brother. Photo of said brother courtesy of a toy camera, a Peruvian hat, and a way too small rocking chair.

¹ Um, not sure about the Bollywood star bit.

BONUS:
Here’s how the above peppy kid looks before he gets his breakfast. Note the lack of sunshine-y energy:

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SIGN: The Club That Ended Writing · 29 days ago

And, yes, the sign reads:

I want to be fuddled with it in
a person with you and men
proceed to a battlefield again
tomorrow this evening

…and I ask: What do we do after recognizing the existence of 4 lines such as that? Can we go on? Do we quit writing, out of respect for such glory? Out of fear? Out of mind?

I haven’t felt this way since the days of The Bee-killing Manchild.

Note: Photo sent to me by my local friend eatABug, aka Jason, who took it as he wandered downtown Kumamoto.

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My Lactose Intolerant Brethren: They Have Us Surrounded · 43 days ago

They’ve besieged the sauce of our rice.
They’ve disgraced the fish of our sea.

Yet strong shall we stand and we’ll fight,
Oh so gas-i-ly.

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The Ha that Made the Young Boy Sing · 62 days ago

ha?

I did not know the “ha” to which the young boy referred.

His English was great. It seemed odd that he would say such an incomprehensible thing in a basic conversation.

But what was this “ha”, and how did it earn his love?

He tried to explain. “You know, like ‘Take on Me?’”

It took me a second. Of course.

It was I who was mistaken, unnecessarily hunting high and low.

May I never again underestimate the persistent glory of mid 80’s Norwegian rock.
—-
BONUS:
I have, in response to world-wide demand, recreated Kumamoto’s Jeff’s World Bar on the Mattel Brand Etch-A-Sketch ™ Drawing Device:

Cameraphone photo taken after sketching on device at aforementioned establishment. I take requests.

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Happy Father's Delay: Hip hop! Puppets! Procrastination! · 72 days ago

Happy Father’s Delay: Hip hop! Puppets! Procrastination! from Kid Ethnic (aka Saleem) on Vimeo.

My brother’s in NC, I’m in Japan, and lil’ Yasmin is in Brooklyn.

So, I started a little recording, and sent it around.

We each got one audio track. Saj and I had webcams, but Yazzy didn’t. So I did the best I could to visually represent her. Er, the best I could without, um, leaving my apartment or doing anything difficult.

Sorry, Dad. It took me a lot longer than I thought it would. We’re still goofball kids who like doing silly weird warbly things while we sing, and we still get carried away with projects and fail to finish then on time sometimes.

But we love ya.

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SIDE PROJECT: A Brief Meditation on Overcoming our Pronounced Excess of Imaginary Hot Women · 77 days ago

Wrote a goofball article for The-Fu.com, you can find it here.

BONUS: They let me draw pictures.

DOUBLE BONUS: And design the header for the site.

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PHOTO: And May the Sun Shine Down On Fanta · 87 days ago

In Orange Rust We Trust.
—-

Spotted in the Suizenji area of Kumamoto, Japan.

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A Brief Introduction to the Way We Party: The Stick Dance · 92 days ago

My, how we throw down.

Oh, yes we throw down.

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All videos and photos from a Mamon wedding in Bombay (my cousin’s). Live band in the house (the upstairs loft, specifically), ah the goodtime silliness. A full set of this trips photos here.

And yes, I’m in Japan now, but chronology’s all silly, right?

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Indian Signs I Have Loved · 106 days ago

Indian sign painters, I love you quite dearly!

The Hands-on paint! The crush of color! Our peeling world!

For there is no party on the Upside! Join me, my people!

The Dolphin Restaurant! The Reshmi Guest House!

Enough with your woodwinds! Silence your car honkings!

In Steely Proclamation of our Finest Juice Location!

In Humble declarations of Occupations!

In Eponymous Hair Salons!

The Paint that Guides the Placing of the Shoe!

The magnifying glass and or mini-stickman in hand, awaiting inspection! The multiple scripts! The weakening Light!

The Unfettered Confidence in Modernity!

The Law Enforcement Papers! The Hip Hop Roots!

The Baba! School! Of Music!

And so!

The GangaFuji Home! The Nrmala Restaurant! The German Bakery! The Yoga (in It’s Homeland)!

The Tigers Most Loquacious and Polite!

The Dropping of the Gerund ‘G’!

The No Kidding!

May your brushes never cease and your stencils never tatter! May your infrequent bursts of plastic usage retain the witty charms of old! May you never ever ever die!
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All spotted on the recent India trip: Mumbai, Varanasi, and on and on…

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